Three Types of Reasons Why Many People Stay Single

By Guest Blogger:
Wisdom Mupudzi

Many people at the beginning of the year set new year resolutions and action plans, desires etc. One of those areas that is very important and topical is the area of relationships. Here are three types or classes of reasons why many people stay single, obviously these are outside people who have deliberately and intentionally chosen to be single for a reason, for a season, seasons or for any other reason.

Psychological

This has to do with what one believes. This can be about members of the opposite sex. These beliefs can come from many places including the media, past experiences etc. For example for someone who hangs a lot with female friends who have been hurt or been disappointed by men, words such as 'all men are dogs' etc can often be heard and become as normal for one's psyche. This can be a liability for any member of that 'clique', who desires to get a man. This can be ingrained in the subconscious without knowing through constant repetition. If you hear a lie too many times, you may end up mistaking it for the truth. The same applies for men who have a negative view of women and generally marriage. Surely a negative view of marriage will no doubt short circuit any relationship with a potential suitor, particularly if its something that he or she wants. So the remedy is that one has to identify those wrong mindsets or negative patterns or bluntly, lies. Some times if its a belief that is coming from a previous hurt or disappointment, the best thing will be to heal from that hurt and realise it was only an experience, it doesn’t necessarily mean that all men or women are like the previous culprit who created the disappointment, whether it was betrayal, cheating or whatever it was. This is ultimately a healing process that needs to take place for the person to let go such beliefs about members of the opposite sex.

Emotional

The 2nd type or class of reasons I want to look at, is the emotional type. This covers how the person feels about themselves, and also about relationships in general. I guess the biggest one is how the person feels about themselves. If someone has a low self esteem,  that can often manifest in the relationships that they allow or have. In most cases for a healthy relationship to fully survive this will require a good self esteem. In other words before we can look at how one feels about the other external parties or somebody else, they have to work out how they feel about themselves. In other words, how do you feel about you. Many people of course go through changes and seasons, however a good self esteem goes a long way in safeguarding relationships be they friendships or romantic ones. This also helps in setting healthy boundaries. One can then look at how one feels about relationships. For many people the subject of relationships triggers joy, excitement, happiness etc. At the same time, to others, it triggers pain, disappointment. This sometimes can signal underlying emotional healing that may need to take place in order for the person to proceed to attract, build and nurture a relationship for the long term. So its important to feel good about you.

Spiritual

The last reason is one of the most important but often less talked about. This can be a tricky subject or an area that many people may not be so ready to confront. Spiritual reasons usually explain wherever logic and natural laws can’t explain. In the area of relationships, the most common ones will be a case where the same things for e.g that may be a mother went through in her childhood, the daughter goes through. In same cases it’s the father, what the father went through, the son goes through. This is complex, as the child or son didn’t do anything to cause that. Sometimes maybe the father too, it wasn’t his fault. Its something that has been flowing down the generations. Sometimes spiritual reasons can come in the form of cycles, for instance many people have come to the place of giving up in the area of relationships because for some reason, each time just before getting married or just before a relationship fully blossoms, there is a glitch of some sort. In other words there is an event or something that occurs that short circuits the relationship. This can often be frustrating, to the point where some have totally given up. However, I believe there are ways and tools to break through. In the same way that doctors, look at a person's blood to determine a few things. The same thing can be applied to the things of the spirit. In the same way that doctors often say, its in your blood, referring to something that a child has, that maybe a mother or father suffered. In other words, its not the child's fault, its just the blood family that he was born into. Whilst there is no scientific way to determine the spiritually DNA, manifestation on the ground, trends and patterns, often leave clues. Sometimes this requires a prophetic eye, however in general, the trends and patterns are usually visible across the family tree. They can be recognised, identified, confronted and dislodged! This then unleashes the parties into freedom and a new life.

The examples given above are only a few in each of the classes or categories. The real work is when a person really examines themselves in terms of what is happening spiritually, emotional and may be their own beliefs about relationships or members of the opposite sex. It is through this journey that true transformation can occur and one can make a quantum leap towards their desires. You can only confront what you identify. Here is hoping that this 2014 will be a great for you across the board, especially in this area of relationships. Be encouraged and always remember you have an Uncommon Destiny!

Wisdom Mupudzi is an Award Winning Author, Infopreneur, and Spiritual Warfare Expert, he currently has 8 ebooks on the market.

For more on Relationships, check out Wisdom’s Award Winning Ebook, Uncommon Destiny Uncommon Partner. You can get your copy here: https://ganxy.com/i/75347/wisdom-mupudzi/uncommon-destiny-uncommon-partner-the-three-levels-of-prayer/uncommon-destiny-uncommon-partner

To discover the raging battle going in the area of Relationships you can check out: https://ganxy.com/i/89352

For Wisdom’s Official Amazon Page: http://www.amazon.com/WISDOM-MUPUDZI/e/B007OZPW4I/ref=ntt_dp_epwbk_0

Tags: destiny, relationships, purpose, looking for love, why am I still single, falling in love, finding the one